Comedian speaks on aging parents, role reversal at Cameron University

Comedian Leighann Lord spoke at a student session at Cameron University on Tuesday about her aging parents and role reversal.

Lord spoke about her experience with caring for her late parents while also maintaining her career and personal life. At the end of her speech, she held a Q&A, where a handful of students asked her questions on what resources are available and advice for fellow caregivers.

One student asked Lord for her advice on caring for aging hierarchical family members. Lord said to speak about the topic more formally before the next emergency, Take the time to float the idea.

“Have those ‘What if’ conversations,” Lord said. “What do you want? What are your wishes? Who’s going to step in when and how? Everybody has their resources. Somebody loses their distance, they can’t drive somebody to their appointments. What they can do is maybe pay for a housecleaner.”

Another student asked how Lord cared for her parents while going on tour. Lord said she had help from a good friend who recommended an elder care attorney.

“She (the attorney) said ‘What do you want,’” Lord said. “I said I want to keep my parents home as long as I could as long as it was safe. That was my guideline, that was my rule. She said if that’s what you want to do, then you need to get home aides, people that come in and help you with that load. My dad did it for as long as he could in the beginning. I also had the most amazing neighbors who would check on us.”

Lord also mentioned the Caring for Caregivers Act. According to the Oklahoma House of Representatives website, the Act offers an expansive tax credit up to $2,000-3,000 for out-of-pocket costs.

One student asked if there are ways to ensure that their loved ones are taken care of. Lord mentioned a Facebook group called “Caring for Elderly Parents.”

“You can go in, you don’t have to introduce yourself, but you can vent, because it’s hard to talk about this,” Lord said.

Lord said finding people who are in that situation is great, not only because you can vent, but because they can guide you to resources. A statewide resource is the Aging Services Division of the Department of Human Services, which is the state’s lead agency for addressing the needs of aging Oklahomans.

Lord said it’s natural for children to have a pediatrician, but older adults should have a geriatrician.

“A geriatrician will be able to take into account the special needs that older folks need,” Lord said. “Your body changes, you don’t heal as quickly, there are certain medications that you shouldn’t be taking once you hit a certain age. A geriatrician will be able to answer those questions. The problem is, there’s only one geriatrician for every 7,000 people, depending on where you’re living. That is an absolute need for a growing population of people who need them.”

Lord’s visit was part of Cameron University’s 12th Academic Festival, “Care and Health: A Generational Approach”.