A year of change

Looking back over this year, I am amazed at the amount of change my daughter and I have navigated. At times it seemed like the changes came one at a time, at other times, the changes piled on top of each other, pounding us like the waves at high tide. B and I would emerge bruised and battered, tired, but better for the experience.

Approaching the holiday season, I thought life would slow down, that changes would be minimal. How silly of me to even think those thoughts. I rather acted like a Greek hero, celebrating my many triumphs, knowing I would never be challenged again. I suffered from the great sin of hubris. If you have followed me for a time, you would know I write often on the sin of hubris, some of my favorite pieces of literature are Greek plays that highlight the sins of Greek heroes. Yet that did not seem to be enough to keep me from engaging in the sin.

Life for me has always been a series of changes. As a young child, life would change more often than not. I learned to never get too comfortable, to never plant roots, because change was coming. And so I seem to not notice how hard and challenging change can be. I was always told to push my feelings down, not show emotion, to never make it harder on other people. To this day, I push my feelings down, paste on a smile, and ask what I can do for everyone else. I rarely, if ever, stop and assess the changes. B is as bad as me. While I never, or I hope I never told her, to not make things harder for others, she keeps her emotions inside.

Thankfully, my dogs always point out to me the toll changes are taking on the family. Perhaps I spend too much time with them, or maybe I am just blessed to have the ability to know when my dogs are upset. When the dogs become upset, I know it is time to stop, assess the overall situation, ask the questions, and get B talking. During these talks, we pet the dogs, play with them, and reassure them that everything is going to be alright. Our dogs are the glue that holds our family together.

I have found that people are either animal lovers or they are not. They either get our attachments to beloved pets, or they smile politely and walk away. For those of us who are animal lovers, we share the secret knowledge of pet love, of their adoration to us. We bask in the glory of their devotion, and for a few short minutes of life, know true, unconditional love. I value these moments almost as much as I value the moments shared with B.

I am grateful for our dogs. Yes, at times they make life complicated, but overall, they keep me grounded, focused, and can always be counted on for a good laugh. And when life gets too busy, when the harried frenzy of activities threatens to take over, they are right by my side, asking for a walk, playtime or a bone. These simple questions highlight the ridiculous amount of time we spend engaged in activities that no longer matter.

The closer we get to the holidays, the more chaotic and stressful our lives become. Take a cue from my dogs and take a minute to stop, relax, and enjoy the sun. Turn your head into the breeze and breathe deep. Take time to stop and enjoy the moment.

Sara Orellana is a former Lawton resident who lives in Oklahoma City.